This is a more feel-y monologue poem to reflect on this past year since it’s coming to an end slowly but surely.
2016 was not an easy year; and I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels that way.
To quickly summarize,
- I lost a family member in a tragic accident
- another family member was diagnosed with harmful cancer
- I was greatly discouraged by someone who was supposed to be an encourager
- personally struggled and fought with a business person (I can’t say businessman because he wasn’t a man)
- had multiple multiple car problems
- struggled like never before with school
- was taken over by stress and anxiety
- and discovered a lot about myself both good and bad
This might not seem like much but to me it was incredibly hard but also easy to write. I wrote it, then edited it, and then edited it again. The raw copy was too personal and more… intense. But the point of this poem is to share that in the end I learned a lot and all these things are important.
So, I hope you read this and feel some kind of something; if not, I hope you enjoy my rhymes~
I don’t want to go into story-times of each event
but I wanted to share what they all meant.
First things first is health, especially mental
having mental freakouts and finding people to talk to is sometimes fundamental.
It allowed me to figure out what’s important to me and helped me prioritize
because it’s important to know what I love and have time to think and reflect is wise.
Along with reflecting, it was important to find something I love to do,
for me and myself only: I tried some old hobbies and some new.
Along with physical strength, being strong mentally is something I need to keep up,
because I learned I never know what kind of people might turn up.
I always knew there were people who were completely selfish caring only about money
but this year I’ve personally dealt with and struggled with so many.
They don’t care who they hurt or bother cuz in the end they just want the cash.
They stick around just long enough then once they get it, they dash.
This year has reminded me that I can’t be shy.
If someone is being rude or unjust I gotta stand up for myself and try.
Try to talk to them, reason with them or just call them out.
Most of the time the jerks think I’m just gonna sit there and pout.
Also I have to ask the questions that are on my mind.
Whether it’s a question about myself or how things work, I never know what I might find.
Along with finding myself, I haven’t finished college yet but I’m close
It hit me that when it comes to the pressure of school, I have to watch my toes.
Grades, gpa, rankings in school do not describe me.
They don’t represent my value or how my life will go through
some are good at school but bad at their jobs
some are good at what they do but in school they were slobs.
I can’t keep being mad at myself because of a letter or a number
because in five years when I’m working, no one will remember.
What’s important is the people who surround me love me and support me,
those people I can cherish forever even when with my grades I bid adieu.
Knowing who my true friends and supporters are,
they’re the ones I need to thank for making me feel like a star.
Always remind them how grateful I am to have them to count on.
Everyone loves feeling appreciated so I should do it now before they’re gone.
But even more than them, my parents have done so much.
Whatever I needed from day one they came in clutch.
Whether I needed help financially or I just needed advice or comfort.
My parents were always there for me and I always came out tougher.
They already gave me life but they keep on giving more
and I can honestly say they want nothing else but see me soar.
I can’t thank them enough,
they’re incredibly loving but also so tough.
I’m not going to be the best at every single thing,
hell I’m not even going to be good at every single thing.
But I can’t be discouraged or feel like a failure.
I need to re-evaluate, try something new that’s the cure.
Asking for help has been something I haven’t ever been good at,
but I learned I need to, sometimes, and that’s that.
I don’t know what my future is or what I want exactly,
but I know what I don’t want physically and abstractly.
And with that, all I can say and mean
is I hope to learn even more in 2017.